Thursday, August 05, 2010

Spent...but still in need

It's been a long week.
I'm drained, spent, and have wasted away to a bare shell of a human.
Issues have arisen, again and again over the past few months, coming to a head on Wednesday, when I had an anxiety attack.
I had an anxiety attack in front of a client. I looked it up after I dropped off my client and raced back to my office. Place a check mark next to all of those symptoms.
A simple miscommunication was the cause, but it revealed to me something that I had kept shoving to the side, in light of more pressing attention grabbers.
I'm a tolerant, patient person. I've obviously reached my limit with this issue. I can't even think of the name of this cause without feeling anxious, a nervous pit in my stomach, sweaty palms, and a need for oxygen that can't be met.
I'm desperate. I'm fragile. I am in need.
So, I went and got myself a prescription for Effexor. That'll do the trick...numb my mind, so that what I'm thinking won't be so bad.
I'm irrational. I'm erratic. I'm lost.
I need a hug.

2 thoughtful remarks:

Nietha said...

hope things are going okay =(

Ama said...

If a hug from your MIL will help...(()) (BIG HUG!)