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Monday, May 25, 2009

Venting

I'm tired.
I'm tired of fighting with my kids.
Moving, talking about moving, planning our move, have all taken their effects on the kids. They act out, they don't listen, screech & scream, whine & carry on, they fight & hit, they do everything in their power to drive me insane.
I'm tired of adjusting. I've adjusted to Ohio, EST, that stupid fucking smell of cow shit from the fertalizer that they spray on the fields, people who assume that Canada is only as big as Ohio, and only exists right above them, to people who attempt to speak Spanish to me, thinking I'm Mexican, to folks proudly proclaiming that they are 1 fourteenth Indian and think that puts us on an equal playing field.
I'm tired of having allerigies during the best part of the season. I'm tired of not being able to set foot outside without sneezing or having eyes that immediately tear up because I'm trying so hard not to rub them. I'm tired of allergy medicine that doesn't work. I'm tired of not being able to wear full make-up because I'm too itchy.
I'm tired of not being able to do the things that I want to do. No blogging (notice I haven't been around to comment much of late?), no photo uploading or editing, no sewing.
I'm tired of packing and sorting, cause it really seems like it's taking forever. I still haven't sorted what's going to FIL or the BSA, and I feel really discouraged because I should have it done by now.
I'm tired of yelling, or feeling like a nap and knowing sleep will be very little for at least another week, tired of serving my husband, of my kids freaking out if no one is giving them direct attention for more than 5 minutes, and of feeling like an awful parent for trying to ignore the kids while trying to get things done, and giving up on said project a quarter of the way into it, and knowing it may not get done before we move out of our home completely.
I'm tired of feeling like my attention is needed in fifty different places besides the 20 I'm already directing it to.

D colored a picture today, and he requested that we send it to Barack Obama because he thought it would be nice. Can you believe I had to look up the address to the White House?

H looked adorable running around at the school playground we visited today, and he insisted that I not help him climb anything.

Mr has been feeling rather run down today, spending it in the recliner with a big fuzzy blanket covering him.

I pushed 220lbs (MR & H) in a wheelchair on a 1.3 mile walk today to help showcase our Tiger Cub Den in the Memorial Day Parade. I'm thanking my lucky stars it was still early and not near it's full blazing heat.

I had an opportunity to clean my new room lastnight, as there was only a path from the door to my bed between the blankets & laundry that I had unceremoniously dumped on my floor in a hurry.

I'm finished with Garage sales, and now need to pack up what's left for BSA & FIL. Thankfully Mr arranged for help with the BSA stuff, and FIL will be here next week for a visit (Mr won't be able to make the drive up to FIL's place). Mr also aranged for extra muscle moving the last of our big furniture out of our old house, so I won't be required to break anything else in the attempt.

I've got some sewing to do, I think since I struggled for an hour and a half to get the kids to sleep that I may just be ready to do some now that I've gotten this off my chest. Thanks for listening.

5 thoughtful remarks:

only a movie said...

I hear you on the allergy medicine!! It has been a tough season for me too.

I hope you mail the picture to Obama. He'll probably get a reply!! That will be so cool.

Hang in there with the moving hell. I remember those days and don't envy you at all.

xxxxoooo

Jack said...

If you need to vent, this is the perfect place for it! Hope you can get some "Me" time soon, so you can store up some strength for the move.

Sorry to your having such a rough go these days... inhale, exhale and repeat :)

Through Thick and Thin said...

PHEW!!! I'm tired just from reading!! LOL
vent away friend - I do it all the time.
Hope today is a good day for you!

Osbasso said...

Sorta makes all my troubles pale in comparison! Hope you get a chance to do more venting here--it should help!

Hang in there, kiddo!

LarryG said...

hang in their mom!
this is a lovely vent ...