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Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Pensive

pensive
–adjective

1. dreamily or wistfully thoughtful: a pensive mood.
2. expressing or revealing thoughtfulness, usually marked by some sadness: a pensive adagio.

I've been pondering a lot today...random thoughts floating through my head, flashes of memories, dreams, things I wish would happen.
Started watching Sex And The City movie last night, and really enjoyed the first half that I watched, must make a note to find it and finish watching it.
I wish I had friends that would make it through the times with me.
Plans are now starting to make themselves known about our move, and it seems to be more and more of a reality. I almost feel stressed about it, because I know there will be a lot to do when we get back to dig ourselves out of the financial hole that was dug there before we can get back on our feet. It feels like each time we make a step we fall down and must dig ourselves out of a sinkhole. It always feels like we're fighting for something. Truthfully, if it isn't worth fighting for it isn't worth it at all, is it? I can only hope that with our maturity and organizational skills that nothing will stand in our way to our goals.
Today was pretty successful in our potty training, we had a minimal amount of accidents, and H was able to tell me when he needed to go in time to get him on the pot. I'm happy with the way it's going so far.
Tomorrow we're going to visit a pediatric dentist, about an hour away, with H. I'm nervous. He has cavities that I can see right now, and I know he'll need them taken care of. All I can think of is watching D come out of sedation when he had his first work done just before his 3rd birthday. I'm scared.
Next week we'll have a pediatrician appointment for both boys, to get some general information about dental health and what we can do to improve their teeth. After getting a tongue lashing from the last dentist that D saw, I'm hoping we can turn this into a positive. As well, we need to get some other issues looked at, and hopefully they can be addressed and taken care of.
I need to schedule an appointment to get my last wisdom tooth out. I'm traumatized from the last one I had removed, which required a dental surgeon and I could feel it braking when he took it out. I'd be lying if I didn't say that I'm terrified to make it to that appointment when I make it.
Tomorrow we've agreed to have a fundraising wrap up meeting, just after Cub Scouts end.
I feel like singing. Singing always seems to calm me, and make me fell less anxious. I just feel antsy all over, and I keep being flooded with memories, thoughts, and things that just won't stop and go away like I want them to.

3 thoughtful remarks:

Southern Sage said...

Well they always told me "nobody said it would be easy, they said it would be worth it"

good luck at the dentist!

{Diamond} said...

I can relate! I had oral surgery to remove a wisdom tooth before and those "Cracking" noises are not comforting, to say the least. I'm going to ask Olivia's pediatrician for a referral to a dentist for her, also, when we go to her check-up next week. She's got a tooth that's chipping from a tiny cavity and, although she's only almost two, I want to try to address it now. When I was growing up, my Mom could only afford to send us when necessary, so thanks to dental insurance, I want to send my kids as often as possible. Lots of luck with the potty training, too!

Anonymous said...

you know how I feel about dentists, ick. Breath, breath, count the minutes you will be there, ask for short break if you need to have them stop for a minute, ask how long it will take. I found knowing how long they will be a tad comforting, then at least I could tell my self only 20 minutes, only 19 more minutes, etc.

I wonder if flossing the kids would help? Get them to brush after each meal? A battery operated brush, maybe it would get more?

Hugs, if you plan, then not much can go wrong. then the things that do go astray, you will at least have a plan to fall back on.