Persistence

Why oh why...
Yes, I can understand that my husband is trying to deal with our most recent loss in his own way, but I'm really starting to get fed up. Fuck.
I wish in some miracle of god, he oculd understand my wish to not be indebted to ANYone.
Just because we don't have a vehicle, it doesn't mean it's the end of the fucking world as we fucking know it.
That's right, get us into MORE debt, and borrow money to get a new vehicle. Let's not have patience, and learn from our mistakes, and learn the value of doing something on our own, and also learn what a gift having our own vehicle is. Let's go running to someone to borrow money instead...let's take the easy way, and let's, while we're at it, keep reminding ME how selfish I am.
Gosh, I love it when other people run my life for me, it makes everything so much easier...while I'm at the peer pressure thing, why don't I go to the most expensive doctor, because that's what "they" think is right...even though I can't afford it.
let's be completely irrational, and rely on everyone else but ourselves in our toughest time.
God knows inner-strength is SO overrated.
Fuck persistense, and fuck interference because we were doing SO GOOD together before this stupid shit.
I HATE HAVING TO FIGHT AN UPHILL BATTLE.
This is our fifth year together and I should not have to struggle so hard.
Fuck it and Fuck him.